Halloween Fly Fishing: The Last Bite
Halloween and fly fishing may seem like a strange mix, but not for the real angler. Yes, I’m talking about the ultimate test of your skills and nerves.
dracula river
Okay, everyone knows the story of Count Dracula. The book is huge and has been made into more than a few scary movies. The one that scared me the most was the recent issue where Keanu Reaves was trying to speak with an English accent. Truly terrifying. Anyway, what’s interesting about Dracula is that he’s based on a real person.
Vlad the Impaler was a nasty man by any definition. By Vlad, I mean the Romanian prince, not the home run-hitting Angels outfielder… except in the playoffs to my dismay. With a nickname like “Empaler”, I shouldn’t have to recite his resume, but I will mention that he liked long sticks with one end buried in the ground and the other end sharpened to a point. It was very wise to stay on the good side of him-“Vlad, did you lose any weight?” etc.
Vlad ruled Romania during his reign and was so enthusiastic about impalement that those in the lumber business look at him with sighs of happiness. As anyone knows from the book, Vlad had his home office in Bran Castle in the Carpathian Mountains, though he did maintain branches in London. In fact, the castle stands today and you can spend your hard-earned money as a tourist wandering the grounds, buying fake fangs, garlic, etc. What’s not widely known, of course, is that Bran Castle was never the home of Vlad, who apparently didn’t care for the overly religious decor and backyard garlic garden.
Vlad the Impaler’s true home is Dracula’s Castle, which stands on the Arges River. The castle is not a hot tourist destination. Perhaps this is because the only thing left are some stones sticking out of the ground. However, below the castle runs the river Arges.
Known in ancient times as Goldtop, this is the place where Vlad did some of his best impalements and supposedly tied a unique fly or two. Even after all these years, the fish are still swayed and it takes a brave angler to hit the nail on the head.
Body armor, garlic, and a shield are not typical equipment for fly fishing. However, if you’re going fishing with Vlad, both are required. The fish are rare. The locals missing fingers and hands will tell you. The “impaler pike” has been known to react to being hooked by accelerating towards the angler and leaping out of the water in the direction of the nether region. The Arges Cutthroat, of course, needs no description, but the Big Macks definitely give rise to the need for garlic. Finally, Vlad Muskie can be caught, but an older gentleman with one ear suggested that this isn’t necessarily a good thing. In general, one does not catch a fish under Vlad’s castle but survives the experience.
You may be wondering what are the best flies to use in such circumstances. The old Woolly Bugger booth? Maybe a Clauser minnow? No. According to the locals, just pinch a finger, rub the blood on a hook, and voila!
Happy Halloween!
By the way, you can actually fly fish in the Arges below the real Vlad’s castle. No armor needed, but garlic keeps mosquitoes away.
Little blood suckers.