Should I have another baby?
Should I have another baby? When I hear other women ask this question, I am always perplexed by the idea that some people PLAN these things. I have been so hurt that my husband and I have never had to “try” to get pregnant. yes they were very injured. If you’ve ever seen me in the middle of my first trimesters, you may have seen me shaking my fists at the sky and yelling, “Stop blessing me!”
When you have a child every couple of years (give or take) like me, your kids start to look forward to a new addition. They say things like, “I’m meeting a baby,” and “Mom, can we name our new baby Frederica?” and “Mom, can we have a girl next?” Those are the easy questions; I still don’t know exactly what to say when little kids ask “How do you get your baby out?” or worse, “How did you get your baby in?”.
Number 6 (so five years): Can I watch Netflix?
Me (looking at photos on my phone): No, lunch is almost ready.
No. 6 (looking over my shoulder): Was that when No. 7 was in your belly?
Me: No, that was when YOU were in my belly.
#6: And it was in my womb?
Me: Haha, no! Babies are only in mommy’s bellies.
N° 6: Well, how do they come out?… Mom, how did they come out of your belly?
Me: *Totally trying to change the subject*
No. 6: Mom, did they cut you? How did they get it out?
Me: *sigh* Mommies have special holes that babies can come out of.
No. 6 (smiling widely): Is it your belly button?
Me: … What do you want to watch on Netflix?
Should I have another baby?
In every family, there are pros and cons to having children, no matter how big or small your family is. I have always believed that the only consideration should be Love: Are you willing to selflessly love a new addition? If so, then everything else can be resolved.
I know what it feels like to cringe at the prospect of telling family and friends that you’re pregnant. again. There seems to be something shameful about having more than three children; almost as if she now she was personally responsible for overpopulation and for setting feminism back 50 years. Avoiding sarcastic jokes, pity, and even hostility from others is inevitable. Resources (financial, time, emotional, etc.) should always be addressed. Having another baby is not easy.
Still, we love having a large family, but I hate hate hate first trimester sickness. If she could pick up a new baby without morning sickness, she’d be perfectly happy. Some people collect weird things, don’t judge me.
N° 6 (8 years old): What if we have another baby? We would have to go to the trouble of naming it.
Me: What would you call it?
No. 6 *meat drops*: Ouch!
Me: No, that’s not a good name.
No. 6: Owlexander.
Dad: Good recovery.
Benefits of having multiple children
My two daughters are best friends. They share everything except clothes. The sound of them laughing with their heads together fills my heart with joy. The four boys after the girls are also best friends. They use their imaginations together, play games together and are endlessly entertained. Best of all, there are things that everyone enjoys together; there are programs that none of them will see if one of them is missing. (By missing, I mean leaving the house for some reason…not on the side of a milk carton.)
There really are so many benefits to having multiple children… Of course, you don’t usually see them between 8:00 pm and 6:00 am Although, come to think of it, the morning after thunderstorms or bad dreams, the children are in a brother or sister’s bed instead of mine!
Are you going to have another baby?
Children are always on the lookout for new baby signs, “Mom, your butt is so big! Are you having another baby?” Of course, children are not the only ones who ask this question. Many people ask, with a kind of morbid fascination, if my husband and I are “over” yet. I’m not offended; I also ask myself that question.
Children are not the only ones who assume that there will be another addition in the future. My last baby shower invitation said “You’re invited to The Taco Mom’s Semi-Annual Baby Shower!”
“Time for another baby!”
People tend to assume that I planned to have all these children, but “planned” is a strong word. Once I asked my husband: “Should she have another baby?”, but she turned out that she was already pregnant. My sisters like to tease me and tell me when it’s time for me to have another baby. My response: “You first!”
So… should YOU have another baby?
In the end, you are the only person who can answer this question for yourself. There is a great deal of joy and love involved in having multiple children, but there is also a great deal of work involved. If this post seems a bit skewed towards having more kids, it may be to make me feel better about having seven kids. But seriously, this life is not for everyone. All any of us can do is search our hearts, pray, and accept God’s will for us…you know, after a brief period of skyward rage.