Thanatophobia: a fear of dying that makes life a living death
Everyone is afraid of death and the process of dying to one degree or another. The problem arises when a person is so afraid of death that it negatively impacts their daily life. I have seen this fear with my own eyes and have seen a loved one deteriorate mentally and physically because they were terrified of dropping dead on the street. Fear ultimately cost them their lives as their health plummeted.
The tragedy of this particular story is that the fear of death, also known as thanatophobia, can be overcome and relegated to the past instead of being cultivated to such a terrible degree. Millions of people around the world suffer from a morbid fear of death or dying that prevents them from living. Terror knows no national, cultural, religious, gender or even age boundaries. Teenagers are just as likely to live in fear of dying as someone in their eighties or nineties.
As with any other chronic fear, thanatophobia can come in a variety of different forms. People’s lifestyles, cultural ties, and past experiences all play a role in the fears they have, and these are important factors that any therapist must understand prior to diagnosis and possible treatment. So what types of thanatophobia are most experienced?
Religion plays an important role in many people’s lives and, in turn, can affect how they deal with the facts of life and death. For many religious people, whose faith wavers and is beset by doubts, the fear of what comes, or doesn’t come, after death can be immense. On the other hand, for devout believers, the fear of eternal damnation can lead to panic attacks just as much as the doubter. The reality of what comes next, unfortunately, as of now, cannot be unequivocally proven by science.
Loss of control is something everyone fears. Death is the ultimate lack of control and this can inspire terror in those most susceptible to fears of chaotic states and confusion. Those who fear death for this reason often go to great lengths to keep it at bay, more than would be considered normal. They engage in very vigorous exercise and health regimens and frequent health clinics almost obsessively. This can actually lead to health problems, increasing your fears and leading to conditions like obsessive-compulsive disorder, hypochondriasis, and depression.
One of the most understandable reasons for fearing death is the process of dying itself. Many people with thanatophobia may not really dwell too much on what happens after life has come to an end, instead suffering from terrible anxiety about how they will die. People naturally seek to avoid pain, disease, and wasting, and death is seen as these three negatives combined into one big, uncomfortable ending.
Especially for parents, another facet of their thanatophobia is the fear of leaving loved ones, particularly children, behind. They may not fear what happens after death very much nor (relatively speaking, of course) fear the process of dying very much. However, much of your mental focus is spent worrying about what will happen to your nearest and dearest when they die.
If someone is terminally ill, it is understandable that they may worry about leaving loved ones behind. However, the problem arises when this type of fear is experienced by a healthy human being with no known life-threatening conditions. The concept plays out in their minds even though they are perfectly fine. New mothers, single mothers, and caregivers of older relatives are the most prone to this type of anxiety.
The diagnosis of thanatophobia will probably come from the victim himself, who will be aware that their fears of death and dying are stronger and perhaps more irrational than the people around them. Family, friends, and co-workers may also recognize a fear-related anxiety disorder and try to persuade the victim to seek professional help. The best way to find a proper diagnosis of this type of anxiety is from a mental health professional. They will be able to say once and for all what the problem is and recommend a variety of solutions to the phobia.
As with all types of anxiety disorders, thanatophobia is best treated by exploring the origins of the fear and by changing the way the brain reacts to anxiety-triggering thoughts and events. Medication can be used to alleviate fear symptoms related to death and dying, but it will not eliminate the underlying problem which will continue to fester until properly addressed. The fear of dying does not have to be a lifelong condition and can be overcome and circumvented in a relatively short time with the right techniques. Instead of struggling with morbid fears of death, life can be lived from one day to the next. It can also be filled with positive thoughts and the absence of anxiety and phobias.
As Woody Allen once noted: “There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?”
I really wish I had known a technique to eliminate the fear of death and die before the phobia and related anxiety disorders ended the life of my family member. It would have saved many people unnecessary suffering and meant another decade or two of your wonderful company.