Relationships and Communication: Sender Vs Receiver
In Malcolm Gladwell’s latest book, Outliers, the author writes:
“Western communication has what linguists call a ‘transmitter orientation’—that is, it is seen as the responsibility of the speaker to communicate ideas clearly and unambiguously… But Korea, like many Asian countries, is receiver-oriented. listener to make sense of what is said. p. 216
Regarding the 6 innate Perceptual Styles, there is a block that I have seen over and over again regarding the communication between the Activity and Flow Styles, and I think it can be explained by this concept.
The activity is clearly geared towards the sender, as people with this style use a lot of contextual information to ensure that the receiver understands what is being communicated. People with the flow style, on the other hand, use a subtle and nuanced word combination that requires the listener to work to fully understand what is being conveyed.
Unfortunately, this difference in orientation is a stage for conflict no matter which direction the communication moves.
When Activity is talking to Flow, Flow is quick to interpret the meaning of the message and may become bored or offended by what they perceive as Activity’s excessive verbiage.
When Flow speaks to Activity, Activity loses much of the meaning Flow intended because Flow’s nuanced choice of words is lost on Activity (which is expecting the context). Activity is often irritated by what they perceive to be biased communication from Flow.
Reflecting on the concept of communication orientation in relation to perceptual styles, I realized that there is a clear delineation between the six perceptual styles.
Three of the six (Activity, Vision, and Goals) are transmitter-oriented, while the other three (Methods, Adjustments, and Flow) are receiver-oriented. Within each group of three, each perceptual style uses the orientation slightly differently and with different intent, but the orientation is the same.
Here’s how it’s broken down by perceptual style, based on the communication characteristics unique to that style.
Transmitter Orientations:
• The activity makes sure to provide ample context when speaking and gives multiple examples through anecdotes that illustrate your point. This is to make sure there is a strong connection and that ‘you are with me’.
• Vision uses persuasive and inspiring language to paint a picture of what they want you to understand. This is to make sure you’re excited, signed up, and that you ‘understand my perspective’.
• Goals issue directives and commands and require feedback to ensure clear understanding by the listener. This is to ensure that there is no ambiguity and that you ‘understand what I want you to do’.
The orientations of the receiver:
• Methods deliver information in a practical way that requires the listener to gather the data themselves. This is because the correct conclusion is obvious for this style and ‘you should draw the same conclusion as me’.
• Settings provide detailed, complete, and accurate information that shows the elegance of the topic but requires the listener to provide context for its relevance. This is because ‘you should be intrigued by the sophistication and complexity of what I’m sharing.’
• Flow speaks in generalities, using subtleties and nuances that allow the listener maximum leeway to respond in order to keep the conversation going, but this also requires the listener to state their preferences, needs, and desires. This is because ‘we’ve connected and you should care enough to understand my unstated intent’.
All of which underscores the fact that, to be effective communicators, we need to understand our own perceptual style (and how to adjust for each of the other five styles).